Salt and Sorrow

“They say that only very good friends quarrel. But at the end of the day a quarrel is a fight between two people’s egos. Since people cannot understand each other by just being honest. May be its impossible to live your whole life without getting hurt but don’t hurt the people close to you.” ― Ai Yazawa

I don’t need to hear your voice to understand that you wanted to hurt me, I don’t need to see your face to know which words were meant for me, and as time passes slowly I cant help but wonder why?

The clock has been too soon to strike witching hour, it’s that time of the night where we wish to exposure and bare our souls to who ever is available to listen, yet I curl, into the most protective position I can find, My soul needs protection, I need protection, and from that sorrow salt is born. Almost therapeutically cleansing my soul.

And even if my biological anatomy is ridding me from sorrow and all its traces, the scars of this new hurt runs deep. It becomes an unseen wound growing on my soul.

It speaks to me, in its fragile broken voice, from the depths of my mind, giving birth to doubt and despair. And though they are newly born, they have befriends my unconscious, tormenting me slowly.
The voice of reason has gone.

And by now it is way pass the witching hour, with not a soul at sight, everyone must be sleeping soundly by now, yet you left me awake with your words.

I wonder what do we call people that hurt other people?

Closing a cycle

Last night I dreamt of you, I dreamt that you where doing well and happy with life.

I held your hand for hours not wanting to let go, how could I lose you when I had just found you again, but I could see from the look in your eyes you weren’t going to stay.

Sooner or later I would have to lose you again, and so I asked you a simple question, “Are you happy with the decision you have made?” you nodded yes, and then I made a decision…. I let go, and watched you disappear for the second time.

When I woke up, realizing it was just a dream made me feel slightly disappointed.

Are you doing well or are you happy? Questions always on my mind, but I think by now we have reached the end of a cycle and I have no more regrets.

What was, what was suppose to be, isn’t anymore and shouldn’t be, I can see that clearly now.

And now that the anger, confusion and depression has faded away, all that remains is the sounds of our laughter echoing of the walls of my bedroom.

We had a good cycle, and now even though I was unable to say it to you face to face, goodbye and good luck.