Closing a cycle

Last night I dreamt of you, I dreamt that you where doing well and happy with life.

I held your hand for hours not wanting to let go, how could I lose you when I had just found you again, but I could see from the look in your eyes you weren’t going to stay.

Sooner or later I would have to lose you again, and so I asked you a simple question, “Are you happy with the decision you have made?” you nodded yes, and then I made a decision…. I let go, and watched you disappear for the second time.

When I woke up, realizing it was just a dream made me feel slightly disappointed.

Are you doing well or are you happy? Questions always on my mind, but I think by now we have reached the end of a cycle and I have no more regrets.

What was, what was suppose to be, isn’t anymore and shouldn’t be, I can see that clearly now.

And now that the anger, confusion and depression has faded away, all that remains is the sounds of our laughter echoing of the walls of my bedroom.

We had a good cycle, and now even though I was unable to say it to you face to face, goodbye and good luck.

Time

I have kind of noticed that I have a tendency of wanting to blog during working hour, I feel like its a “this cant wait moment” I get from time to time.

Thinking back to last year (which was not to long ago) and all the things that have happened.

I cried and I laughed,

I Travelled on some holidays , while I spent the others in bed,

I worried myself out too much at times, and too little at other times,

I watch hours of T.V and then dedicated hours to reading books,

I lost some friends, and I gained new family members,

I fought for what I believed in, and I also doubted myself,

All in one year, And I have come to realize that we live in moments and its all these little moments in our lives that define who we are, every thing in the end has a way of working itself out, and time has a way of making you forget about all the bad stuff, and that’s why we always say “I remember the good old days”

I think I did alright, and I am not so heart broken anymore either, I was thinking it would have been harder living on after, feeling an immense amount of pain, having a dead end life and nothing to look forward to, But time seems to be more kinder to me that I was to myself, it treated me with care and patience, and lead me on to a new path, A new path that is constantly unfolding. 

I may have some up days and I may have some days where I will get really low, but I know that no matter what happens, everything will always continue to move forward, and that’s what makes me feel gratitude towards life and time.

In the end, I just wanted to say good luck this year guys, we have made it this far =)