Showing posts with label hurt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hurt. Show all posts

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Are our dreams a luxury


Are we plagued with Success Stories?

It is a question that pops in my head every now and then.  We grew up watching Disney, To adults telling us that if you can dream it you can do it, If you are not doing it then you don’t want it bad enough.

How true is this?

When it comes to dreams, the one thing I have learnt is that no one is going to take your hand and help you, it’s the lonest process ever, battling it out with yourself and by yourself. 

But what if, to some of us our dreams are a luxury that we can’t afford.

When we are younger, Our dreams seem to be infinite, there is nothing that we feel we cant achieve.

Then we grow up, and everything seems to be as if we are chasing butterflies.

Dreams take time and money.

And if you are a part of the real world, a world where you have to get up to a  8 to 10 hour job a day to put food on the table, there is just no room for sacrificing, (I am not saying that my situation is as extreme as my sentence)

When you are this unhappy, you seek for things within your power, to make yourself feel happy so that you can wake up the next day and work all over again.

But you will always cry about the dreams you can’t give up.

Because you know deep down, inside that this is not what you are meant to do,  deep down inside you know you should be setting time aside to go out and achieve your dreams, instead of doing everything in your power to stop yourself from going crazy or worst trying to kill yourself.

You begin to hate yourself; however that hate gets worst when you realize that you have wasted so much time surviving that you have not developed any talent for your dreams at all.

You need to live, eat, breath and sleep your dreams, however you have no talent.

And everyone pours their infinite wisdom into you and confirms everything you already know, it’s because you don’t want it bad enough that is hasn’t happened.

But now you have nothing to sacrifice, and you don’t get them because you are so talentless & you don’t want them bad enough.

You can’t be the next Walt Disney, you don’t make the cut, you aren’t good enough, you can’t make up your mind, you are not committed.

By now I am sure you have spent so much time, helping everyone out without wanting recognition for it, in fact I believe you have been told several times who asked you to?  And now you realize everything you invested time in, never wanted you to invest time in it in the first place, you hate yourself even more.

You have no time, money or talent.

And you are stuck with the idea, of dreams being a luxury you can’t afford, because you don’t have the power to get up and do them.

What are you going to do now?

Sunday, June 9, 2013

Salt and Sorrow

“They say that only very good friends quarrel. But at the end of the day a quarrel is a fight between two people’s egos. Since people cannot understand each other by just being honest. May be its impossible to live your whole life without getting hurt but don’t hurt the people close to you.” ― Ai Yazawa

I don’t need to hear your voice to understand that you wanted to hurt me, I don’t need to see your face to know which words were meant for me, and as time passes slowly I cant help but wonder why?

The clock has been too soon to strike witching hour, it’s that time of the night where we wish to exposure and bare our souls to who ever is available to listen, yet I curl, into the most protective position I can find, My soul needs protection, I need protection, and from that sorrow salt is born. Almost therapeutically cleansing my soul.

And even if my biological anatomy is ridding me from sorrow and all its traces, the scars of this new hurt runs deep. It becomes an unseen wound growing on my soul.

It speaks to me, in its fragile broken voice, from the depths of my mind, giving birth to doubt and despair. And though they are newly born, they have befriends my unconscious, tormenting me slowly.
The voice of reason has gone.

And by now it is way pass the witching hour, with not a soul at sight, everyone must be sleeping soundly by now, yet you left me awake with your words.

I wonder what do we call people that hurt other people?





Monday, July 27, 2009

Aha

You told me the truth and yet, I got angry … Why did it hurt so much I don’t know…
The truth doesn’t hurt, especially for me, I’m not the type who cares about what people think.
Maybe it’s the reality of never going to be ……
But then again I’m not the type who is going to go and try or pretend to be something I am not just for acceptance ..
Case Closed….. But why am I still so upset?
That I will never know…


And what it all comes down to
Is that I haven't got it all figured out just yet'cause
I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is giving the peace sign

I'm free but I'm focused
I'm green but I'm wise
I'm hard but I'm friendly baby

I'm sad but I'm laughing
I'm brave but I'm chickenshit
I'm sick but I'm pretty baby

And what it all boils down toIs that no one's really got it figured out just yet'cause
I've got one hand in my pocket And the other one is playing the piano