Are our habits worth dying for?

I have tried to left that part of me behind, but before I knew it, it had somehow creped back into my life again, becoming a part of me.

They say old habits die hard, Are we going to die with our habits or without them, or better yet are our habits worth dying for?

I am not sure.

Been thinking a lot lately, as if it is some sort of physical sport I have to practice in order to improve (which clearly we all know is not the case) .

The question that comes to mind is, I am happy with myself and my habits, but others aren’t?  What do I do in this case? Do I try and understand why people would be unhappy with them, do I change completely or so I find a middle ground? What should I do indeed, when I am happy and someone else is not so happy with me.. What indeed should I do?

We no matter how much I think about it, If you’re happy then YOU ACTUALLY ARE happy, we are going come across people that will disapprove of what we do, in fact we come across these people more often than we think we would.  I think the best solution is the stand your ground unless you find a reason not to, because lets face it, we as human beings are absolutely shit at doing things we don’t want to do. We thrive on motivation and no one else can tell us better, with that being said, be what you believe is right, even when others find it wrong,  But remember once in a while you got to put blind stubbornness aside and think “Are our habits worth dying for?”

Because some time when we live with our eyes closed, we end up missing some important wake up call and we needed to have.

Closing a cycle

Last night I dreamt of you, I dreamt that you where doing well and happy with life.

I held your hand for hours not wanting to let go, how could I lose you when I had just found you again, but I could see from the look in your eyes you weren’t going to stay.

Sooner or later I would have to lose you again, and so I asked you a simple question, “Are you happy with the decision you have made?” you nodded yes, and then I made a decision…. I let go, and watched you disappear for the second time.

When I woke up, realizing it was just a dream made me feel slightly disappointed.

Are you doing well or are you happy? Questions always on my mind, but I think by now we have reached the end of a cycle and I have no more regrets.

What was, what was suppose to be, isn’t anymore and shouldn’t be, I can see that clearly now.

And now that the anger, confusion and depression has faded away, all that remains is the sounds of our laughter echoing of the walls of my bedroom.

We had a good cycle, and now even though I was unable to say it to you face to face, goodbye and good luck.

Time

I have kind of noticed that I have a tendency of wanting to blog during working hour, I feel like its a “this cant wait moment” I get from time to time.

Thinking back to last year (which was not to long ago) and all the things that have happened.

I cried and I laughed,

I Travelled on some holidays , while I spent the others in bed,

I worried myself out too much at times, and too little at other times,

I watch hours of T.V and then dedicated hours to reading books,

I lost some friends, and I gained new family members,

I fought for what I believed in, and I also doubted myself,

All in one year, And I have come to realize that we live in moments and its all these little moments in our lives that define who we are, every thing in the end has a way of working itself out, and time has a way of making you forget about all the bad stuff, and that’s why we always say “I remember the good old days”

I think I did alright, and I am not so heart broken anymore either, I was thinking it would have been harder living on after, feeling an immense amount of pain, having a dead end life and nothing to look forward to, But time seems to be more kinder to me that I was to myself, it treated me with care and patience, and lead me on to a new path, A new path that is constantly unfolding. 

I may have some up days and I may have some days where I will get really low, but I know that no matter what happens, everything will always continue to move forward, and that’s what makes me feel gratitude towards life and time.

In the end, I just wanted to say good luck this year guys, we have made it this far =)